What I want ????????

Today I confessed my predicament to my best friend. Was I honest ? Did I tell her the whole thing ? I know the truth. How much of it was true ? Is this my imagination ? I was alone with the demons. I did not talk. But I am aware of demons rising in my mind. Ignored. Then composed, calm and tried to be normal. I do not know what I want. Why am I so guilty of nothing ? I want this phase to pass. May I come out with colors.

Drifting thoughts

I think I am going through the same old phase. My mind is spinning out of control. I hate this because it is very difficult to get out of this. I have been through this status earlier also. It took me many months to come out of this. I wanted to share something with my best friend . But I came to know that she is estranged from her spouse and moved out with kids. So there is no point speaking with her regarding this. It is no celebration. I want to escape. I am trying to conceal everything from every one including myself. I am in denial mode. I may fall sick.

Package people

Some how these days I feel that I am living a fake life. I know, I cannot stand this. I feel I am a misfit in the world of presentations. Yes, Presentations, present the shit in glorified manner. Is n't there a normal world, normal life. Is it essential that a person's worth is with the package he is drawing, the post he is holding. I am also getting suck into this. I want to break free. I don't know whether I am correct or is it my insecurities, my incapabilities that are making me feel like this.